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| 'Sup! |
It's been a long time. Like, a really long time. Sorry about that. I could make excuses about being busy, but... the truth is, I didn't feel like writing. The transition from Japan back to the US was very difficult for me. I kept telling myself that I had to write about it on the blog, talk about my feelings, post a lot of pictures, etc, etc... but each time I geared up to do that, I was struck by such a crippling sense of depression (followed closely by inexplicable guilt) that I just couldn't do it.
I don't want you to think that I'm not happy to be here. I'm thrilled to be back with my husband, my family, my kitties, my ole' stomping grounds, and delicious Americany-homey foods. I'm very, very happy to be home. But I miss Japan. A whole heck of a lot.
I miss my friends there. I miss Fukuoka. I miss the food. I miss the clatter of trains rumbling off in the distance. I miss the challenges presented by daily life. I miss walking everywhere. I miss the feeling of tatami under my feet. I miss the sound of Japanese language all around. I miss the smell of Hakata ramen, even the gross "sweaty feet" kind.
But, mostly, I think I miss my job. I was a really good ALT. I mean, I know I wasn't perfect. But I put in a lot of time and effort into all my lessons and activities, and those efforts were recognized. I felt truly valued by my school, my students, and my co-teachers.
Since coming home, I made the choice not to seek employment until the new year (2015, aka tomorrow). That's because I'm applying to a slew of really-super-hard-to-get-into-dream-school graduate programs (fingers crossed, fingers crossed!!!!). My thought process went like this: "Well, I've worked reeeeeally hard these last two years and put aside a chunk of money, so I'll take this available time... these next six months... and spend it writing new plays, traveling, and making my applications as damned strong as possible." DW heartily agreed.
For the most part, I've done just that. But what I didn't account for was the absence that work would leave within myself. I knew I'd miss Japan. I knew I'd miss my friends. But I didn't really think I'd miss the work. So, when I came home (and inevitably gained 15 lbs of "Welcome back to the US!" weight), I felt really worthless. Valueless. Like my work, my personal work, meant nothing. Like I meant nothing.
Hey, okay. Calm down. Obviously, now, I know that's not true. I may be a chubbier WR, but I am a super awesome WR. (Cheesy smile and two thumbs up!) I remember that now. So, no worries. But that's the real reason why I couldn't write the blog. Writing my "Farewell to Japan!" post was just going to bring up a lot of feelings that I didn't (and maybe still don't) want to face.
I'm hoping that someday soon, I'll be ready to post my final pictures from Japan (because, damn, some of them are really beautiful) and reflect on my two wonderful years living and working there (because, damn, it was pretty wonderful), but for now you'll just have to wait a little longer.
But! Hey! That doesn't mean no Rowland-Weinstein Adventures! Heeeeellz no.
In the Rowstein tradition of doing idiotic, self-flagellating monthly challenges, I bring you....
>>>> VEGANUARY! <<<<
That's right, your meatiest-and-cheesiest loving friends are going vegan for the month of January. We might actually die. But, if we don't, we will certainly learn some new recipes and food tricks that we'll be happy to share with you. And we'll be posting the highlights (and photos!) here every week! I promise, we'll be back on the blogging wagon.
Until next week's post, I wish you all the happiest of New Years! May 2015 bring all the love, adventure, happiness, health, and fulfillment that you could ever hope for!
Thanks for reading!
WR
P.S. And seriously, you should probably feed those fish. It's been, like, six months!
